Is Teaching 'Respect' Important?

Dr. Wendy Ghiora – Posting #33 – December 19

As good teachers know, it’s not about the lesson plan; it’s all about the student. We also know, it is imperative we teach the “whole” student. Possibly, one of the most important things we can teach our students is respect.

Please note that respect is not the same as obedience. The difference is, a student (or child) might obey because they are afraid. When a student respects you, they obey because they know you really care and want what’s best for them.

Like it or not, when we sign up as a “teacher,” we sign up for being a role model who, by example, has powerful influence on students, over the course of a semester or year. The period of time we spend with our students is enough to, by example, gain the respect of the student. How does a teacher receive respect? By showing it. That said, the best way to teach respect is by example and demonstration. When a student experiences respect, they know what it feels like and can begin to understand its importance. Just keep in mind the golden rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

Respect is a learned attitude. It is a part of one’s behavior that will greatly help a student succeed in life. If children don’t have respect for peers, adults, or themselves, it will be almost impossible for them to attain success at anything.

Would you like some tips on how to not only “talk the talk,” but also “walk the walk?” That old saying is still true, “Actions speak louder than words.” These pointers should get you off to a great start as a good role model of respect for your students.

How can we best model respect as a teacher or parent?

Be polite- Say the magic words, “please” and “thank you.” Say “excuse me,” when you must speak to someone who is otherwise engaged in a conversation.
Be fair- Listen to the child’s side of the story and get all the facts before reaching a conclusion. “Let me see if I heard you correctly. You said,…….?”
Be honest- If you do something wrong, openly (yes, in front of the whole class) admit it and apologize. “Class, I am so terribly sorry I led you astray. I was wrong about that. Here’s the correct answer. You learn something every day.”
Be a good listener- Give the student your full attention. Do not interrupt until they have completed their communication. You may well be the only adult they can talk to.
Be positive- Don’t ever get close to embarrass, insult or make fun of a student; encourage them and compliment their progress and success. Think hard before saying something about a student in front of the others. Actually, comments made to a student in front of their peers should only be positive ones.
Avoid poor role models- When you see examples of disrespect, discuss them. “Students, did you notice how the boy in the film just grabbed Johnny’s toy without even asking permission to touch it? What do you think about that?”
Be reliable- Keep promises. Show students you mean what you say and that they can count on you. If you promise to be there at 6:00 A.M. for the pancake breakfast, be there!
Be caring- Demonstrate your concern for people, animals and the environment.

Important steps

It is vital to place much emphasis on teaching students to respect themselves. Self-respect is indeed one of the most important kinds of respect. Once children respect themselves, it is easier for them to respect others.

If a student makes a mistake, or breaks a rule, remind them you still care for them and turn the mistake or transgression into a learning opportunity, where the child can still make amends and feel like a winner.

Help your students set and achieve personal goals. Watch their self-respect skyrocket as they see themselves achieving those goals!

Encourage honesty frequently. Let your students know they may be able to fool some people, but they can’t fool themselves. There is no pride in stealing, cheating or lying; for they will only be hurting themselves and holding their own abilities down.

Your opinion means the world to your students. If you believe in them, voice that belief in them and in their success and they will believe it too. It is also important to show you care. It’s okay to say, “I really care about you,” “I know you can do it!” If appropriate, give hugs or encouraging pats on the shoulder.

Is teaching respect important? What do you think?

A youth is to be regarded with respect. How do you know that his future will not be equal to our present? Confucius